The World Is Heavy: Here’s How I Cope

I originally started this blog post with several examples of what makes the world heavy. I stopped and decided to delete those examples and start this blog again.

Why?

Because you know what makes the world heavy. Especially now. If you’re reading this newsletter, you’re aware of what’s happening. You may be a heart-centered individual, most likely an empath just like me who is seeing and feeling it all. You may be hoping and praying for more love and light to enter our world.  

But sadly, sometimes it can feel like our prayers are unanswered. I’m sure you find yourself feeling baffled, disengaged and hurt at times. I feel the same; humanity is grieving and searching for answers.

Amidst it all, I do a solid job keeping my vibes high and I want the same for you.

Although I have proven techniques that have helped me rise above the muck, they don’t prevent me from sadness, anger or a “What the **** is this all about?” frustration cry to God every now and then.

My techniques have taught me to coexist with the dark and limit its impact on my mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health.

Here’s a few things I do to cope that I invite you to try and make your own:

I maintain a high level of empowerment

There’s a lot I can’t directly control. I’m aware of this and accept this. And despite knowing I can’t fix it all, I maintain my power. If I ever catch myself feeling helpless, I turn those feelings around, fast.

For example, school shootings have weighed on me heavily. I’m not in a position to travel to offer direct support to the grieving families nor can I change a policy or offer a monetary donation that will have a profound on this important cause. Regardless of these limitations, I realize there are many things I can do.

For starters, in honor of those who have lost their lives and all who are impacted, I can live my best life ever. Oftentimes before I go for a walk outside or go to yoga class, I dedicate that practice to those who are suffering. I also choose kindness and a future-focused mindset. I remind myself that I am in control and even though I may not directly impact a certain situation, I can directly impact others. As an example, every time I show someone self-love or teach a class centered on self-love, I may be preventing an act of violence (or at least a nasty conflict at work or home) and that is something – a meaningful contribution.

I remember my purpose

I remind myself regularly that just because I’m living in a time where information is readily available, that doesn’t mean it is for me. I am here to live my life, and to fulfill my purpose. I want to capture the love and learnings from being a mom, wife and spiritual teacher and to continue to grow and evolve mind, body and soul. Keeping my purpose in mind, it’s easier not to:

  • Overly consume the news (as it doesn’t directly connect to my journey)
  • Feel like external events can negatively impact what I want and need to do to fulfil my soul’s journey (there’s that empowerment thing again)

 
I lean into my faith

The Universe has blessed with so much. A beautiful family. My health. My mediumship gifts. Whether I am enjoying the sight of a dolphin popping its head in and out of the ocean or experiencing a perfectly timed sign and synchronicity (you know I love my 438 license plates. Hi Dad!), I am regularly reminded that there is a God and he/she/they are wonderful and magical.

When I feel stuck and start whining that ‘Things don’t make sense’, I lean into the love I feel from God and work to transform my negative vibes to high vibes. I then feel those warm tingles and sit back and think the same thing as before, “Things don’t make sense”, and I begin to shift my perspective. Once I open myself up to the love of the Universe, I can accept I will never fully understand everything (especially the yucky and dark stuff that happens) and that is okay, as I fully trust my God.

Join me in spreading my messages of breaking judgement habits and strengthening intuition even further: forward this blog to a few family members and friendsThe greater the shares, the greater the impact – They can subscribe here.  

Sincerely,

Dr. Danielle Clark | Psychic Medium 

PS – As someone who has experienced emotional, physical and sexual trauma all before the age of fifteen, for several years I personally struggled with wondering why ‘bad things’ happened to me and others in the world. Robert Schwartz’s book Your Soul’s Plan: Discovering the Real Meaning of the Life You Planned Before You Were Born has offered me a tremendous amount of insight to help me make sense of my own lived experiences and those happening in the world. Check out his work if it resonates.

PPS – If you haven’t noticed, I’m spicing up the PS and PPS section of this newsletter this week. Do you have a topic idea for a future blog? If so, I’d love to hear from you. Hit reply and send me a note.

Stop Feeling Being Bad About Feeling Good

From time to time, I touch myself for pleasure. I choose to do this for the joy and rejuvenation effects, for the “I love myself and deserve to feel good” vibes. The action isn’t against my religion or belief system, nor does my hubby care one way or another if I touch myself.

But right before I masturbate and right after I finish, I feel guilty. A gnawing “This is wrong” voice and feeling find me. My stomach gets a slight knot and shame washes over me.

So why does something that is meant to refresh and relax me, also give me a yucky feeling?

The other day at the gym, I got closer to uncovering the answer…

I’m a member of Orangetheory Fitness. I regularly attend high intensity workout classes that a trainer leads. On any given day there’s a combination of treadmill, rower and free weight work. The trainer will give me my pace and put together a series of base pace efforts, all out efforts and rests. It’s a tough workout which is exactly why I love it!

After running and climbing hills on the treadmill for half an hour I made my way to the weight floor. I was given three exercises to do until time was called. After each one, I was supposed to rest. But guess what? Even though I was winded, sore and could really use some water, I didn’t rest.

Why didn’t I rest? Because I felt guilty. The gnawing “This is wrong” voice I get when I masturbate found me again every time I paused from an exercise.

This gave me an ah-ha moment. I struggle with allowing myself to feel good. Whether it’s experiencing the full bliss of some special me time, or giving my body a break after lifting, something deep within me associates being good to myself with being bad.

I have important answers I need to search for, like how to create a better relationship with the things that make me feel good. I know where I’ll start, and that’s thanks to doing similar self-work in the past.

Here’s what I’ll focus on now:

  • Reminding myself through reflection, journaling and affirmations that I am a human being not a human doer. Every day I’ll tell myself I’m here to work hard and to relax, have fun and enjoy life.
  • Adding more just for me things into my week so that feeling of being good to myself comes more naturally.
  • Exploring my past to see if I can identify any past experiences or limiting beliefs shared with me that I need to understand, give love to, and let go.

I’m hoping that if you can relate to this blog, you’ll put together a list of things you can focus on too. Life is too short and beautiful for any of us to spend too much time feeling low, overworked and ashamed.

Join me in spreading my messages of breaking judgement habits and strengthening intuition even further: forward this blog to a few family members and friendsThe greater the shares, the greater the impact – They can subscribe here.  

Sincerely,
Dr. Danielle Clark | Psychic Medium

PS – ‘Here’s an affirmation to give you a boost of self-love when you’re feeling bad about feeling good, ‘I am worthy of all good things. I give myself unconditional love always.’ 

PPS – If you struggle with putting yourself first or giving yourself some much needed TLC, grab your journal and a pen. Oftentimes, these limiting beliefs stem from our childhood, be it directly or indirectly. Did a magazine or TV show make you feel like it wasn’t okay to do something you wanted to do? Or perhaps that it wasn’t okay to feel a certain way? Did a family member tell you something is bad for you, when it’s actually the opposite? (for example – you wanted a second serving of food because you were still hungry, but your grandma wouldn’t let you eat more because she said you’d gain weight). Write anything that comes to mind. Then light all of these limiting beliefs on fire (or rip them up slowly into small bits) repeating, ‘These limiting words, beliefs and actions are no longer mine to carry’.

I Self-Sabotaged

My sister Kelley came to stay with me a few weeks ago.

Late one night, we fought about parenting stuff – we clearly didn’t agree on how to approach a situation with one of our kiddos. Words were exchanged. It turned into an ugly spat.

I walked away from our exchange hurt. I felt disrespected and undervalued by my sister. I was also ashamed for letting myself walk into an unkempt, fiery version of me. Although I told myself to walk away several times, that the argument was better served with my best self… I didn’t. I stayed for the fight and escalated it.

The next morning, I could still feel the emotions of the spat with me. I went to the bathroom mirror looking for a pimple or blackhead. Having sensitive skin and acne scars from my old picking-and-popping days, I knew to leave the extractions to the estheticians. But it was too tempting… I wanted a distraction.

I leaned toward the mirror and squinted, finally finding a blackhead at the crease of my nose. I dug and squeezed, pressed and pinched until that blackhead was no more.

Ugh Danielle. Don’t do this. You know it’s not good for your skin.

But what did I do?

More picking and squeezing until I finally leaned away from the mirror to witness a face full of red splotches. I looked like Hellboy with chickenpox! Why, Danielle? You know this happens every time!

I knew my face picking would cause more harm than good. I knew I’d end up with inflamed spots around my nose, cheeks and chin. But I did it anyways.

That morning when my sister woke up, we said our “I’m sorry’s”. While there was still awkwardness in the air, the tension dissipated. And as the day progressed and I started feeling better, I regretted my blackhead binging episode even more.

So why did I do it? Why did I self-sabotage?

Several reasons…

  1. Because I was feeling low, and like attracts like. I felt in good company doing a low-vibing task (like messing up my face). And perhaps, without being conscious of it, it was also a way to punish myself for the shame I felt for not holding more grace during Kelley and I’s quarrel.
  2. My self-sabotage was also my own form of escapism. I couldn’t focus on my negative feelings about the fight because I was too busy causing another problem for myself.

I’m aware that I’ve been down this road before and I need to be more careful. I have a long history of self-sabotage; of making a good scenario bad and making a bad scenario worse because I perceive a lack in some way. I’m not good enough, smart enough, caring enough…

If you self-sabotage, there are a few important things I want you to know…

  1. You’re not alone. If you go to the gym and then binge eat before bed. Or if you keep racking up your credit card debt even though you don’t have the means to pay it off. There’s many of us in the same boat and with knowing that, I hope you’re kinder and gentler the next time you hurt yourself.
  2. Spending time in reflection can help you better understand why you hurt yourself and why you add more stress and challenges to yourself. This will help you pinpoint where you need more _______ (fill in the blank. Self-love. Discipline. Healing). Hint: Oftentimes, self-sabotage is a result of unresolved trauma.  
  3. Your awareness can lead to a change in behavior. Knowing your triggers and your self-sabotaging go-to’s (blackhead picking, for instance) will allow you to better cope and create a strategy that ensures your actions stay positive, or at least neutral during hard situations.

The next time I get the urge to pinch and pick, I’ll think of this blog and grab a stress ball, not my face.

Here’s a few articles I found on self-sabotage that may help you (and will definitely help me).


Join me in spreading my messages of breaking judgement habits and strengthening intuition even further: forward this blog to a few family members and friendsThe greater the shares, the greater the impact – They can subscribe here.  

Sincerely,
Danielle

PS – Here’s an affirmation to use after you self-sabotage, ‘I send love, grace and understanding to my destructive patterns. I can’t change the past, but I will change the future.’

PPS – Grab a pen and your journal. Spend a few minutes thinking about what areas in your life you self-sabotage. Is it with money? Time? Relationships? Health? What’s the one area you want to work on improving now? Next, identify some of your limiting beliefs around the topic at hand which may contribute to your self-destructive patterns. Do you believe it’s not possible to get out of debt? Do you believe you’re not worthy of love? Do you think you’ll be unattractive regardless if you lose the 50lbs or not? Once you have a grasp on your limiting beliefs, write positive affirmations for each of them and use them every day for the next month to build up your internal power and to help retrain your brain.  

If You Have The Chance, Take It

I’m a business professor at a local community college and attended our large faculty meeting a few weeks ago. Our guest speaker was Steve Griggs, CEO of the Tampa Bay Lightning.

Steve kicked off his presentation stating he’d be giving away four tickets to that night’s game against the Boston Bruins.

I perked up in my seat. I love a good Lightning game. I’m from just outside of Boston too, so the matchup was perfect and it’d be a competitive game! And most importantly, I was pumped for this opportunity because just the week before, my husband had been given sixth row seat Lightning tickets but couldn’t go because he was in the hospital.

I pictured the joy these tickets would bring to me and my family, and I whispered to Spirit, ‘Thank you for sharing abundance with me.’

Steve then said he’d give the tickets to the first one who knew where his alma mater Wilfred Laurier University was. And guess what? I knew where it was! Ontario!

But instead of jumping out of my seat and proudly exclaiming the answer, I mouthed it to myself.

I have no idea why I did this. A part of me was spaced out and I think scared to be embarrassed if I was wrong (even though my intuition told me I was right). It was so odd as I wanted the tickets but something in me froze.

Someone else popped up from her chair and loudly blurted, ‘Calgary’.

Steve said, ‘No’.

It was now my shot to speak up and claim those tickets that in some unexplainable way, I already felt were mine.

But…

I stayed frozen. A woman excitedly yelled, ‘Ontario!’

A few seconds later, reality hit me. I hadn’t spoken my truth. I hadn’t claimed what was mine. I was baffled. And upset.

As Steve gave his presentation, the energy within me grew. I had to redeem myself, for myself. I had to show myself that I honored my intuition and that I was worthy of abundance.

At the end of the presentation as Steve exited the stage, I followed him.

When I caught up to him he was signing autographs for a small group of people. When I could, I went up to him and blabbed and blubbered some version of this, ‘I believe in signs and synchronicities… I’m from Boston… I knew the answer… My husband had to give up Lightning tickets because he was in the hospital… I couldn’t let you leave without honoring my intuition…’

Steve (unlike me) was straight to the point, ‘Do you want tickets?’

And I claimed what was mine, ‘Yes, yes I do.’

The next thing I knew, Steve gave me his cell phone # and asked that I text him. Shortly after I had four club seat tickets for the Lightning versus Ducks game that included unlimited food and drinks. I thought this game would be even better than if we saw the Bruins as my hubby had another week to heal.

A week later my family and I went to the game and we had an amazing time (my hubby especially was so appreciative), and the Lightning beat the Ducks in overtime to clinch the playoffs.

Thanks to this experience, I’ve been reminded to:

  • Claim what’s mine
  • Trust my intuition
  • Not worry about what others think

I’ve also remembered that it’s never too late to take action and make something I want happen.

I’m hoping you’ll remember these lessons too.

Join me in spreading my messages of breaking judgement habits and strengthening intuition even further: forward this blog to a few family members and friendsThe greater the shares, the greater the impact – They can subscribe here.  

Sincerely,
Danielle

PS – Here’s an affirmation to use to attract abundance, ‘I attract abundance with ease. I’m a magnet for opportunities to give and receive.’

PPS – For us to receive abundance, we also need to take action towards finding that abundance (after all we are co-creating with the universe). Grab your pen and journal. What areas of your life would you like to see more abundance? Career opportunities? Travel opportunities? Finances? Once you’ve identified a few areas, identify what actions you’re already taking towards your goals (i.e. you’re applying for 10 jobs a week; taking college classes to help drive up your skill level). Give thanks to all you’re doing (positive vibes helps abundance find us). Next, identify new ways you can take action. How can you enhance your mindset on the subject, perhaps becoming more positive and open-minded that what you want is coming your way? How can you learn more in the area you want to experience more abundance? What steps can you take to better position yourself to receive abundance (i.e. if you’re looking for love, make sure you have a plan to be out of the house and more social so you can meet new people). Now make your list a reality.

Signs Are All Around Us

A few days a month I work at a super cute metaphysical shop (if you’re in the Palm Harbor area, come and check us out. I offer psychic and mediumship readings, demonstrations and workshops and would love to have you with us).

One afternoon last month, I overheard a customer say in excitement, ‘On the day my mother Lisa passed away, me and my siblings decided to go out to lunch to reminisce. And guess what? You won’t believe this! The waitress’s name was Lisa!’

The owner smiled. Of course, the owner believed it…

Why? Because she has heard and directly experienced hundreds of similar stories. And I have too. That’s how it is when you’re ‘spiritually linked in’.

My Dad lived in Stoneham, Massachusetts most his life. His telephone prefix (which was also mine as a kid) was 438. After Dad passed away, I’d wake up at 4:38am on the dot and look right at the alarm clock. I also started seeing license plates with 438 on them regularly. Keep in mind I am not an early riser (the hubby will verify) nor had I ever noticed a 438 license plate before.

Hopefully I have you realizing: It’s true. Signs and synchronicities from our loved ones are all around us.

But perhaps you haven’t seen a sign in awhile or perhaps ever? If you haven’t, no worries. Your loved ones are still with you – they are always with you and I can assure you they are trying to get messages to you. You just might need a sign to see the sign – like this blog post.

The #1 thing we can do to be open to receiving signs is shutting down our pesky I don’t know for sure that this is a sign voice. Easier said than done, I know. I’m a medium and at times still experience doubt.

But, there’s hope for us if we stay open and know what we’re looking for.

Here’s a small list (of many) possible ways your loved ones in spirit may be trying to get your attention:

  • Music: If you find yourself thinking of your loved one in spirit and then you turn on the radio and their favorite band is on, this is no coincidence.
  • Animals + Birds: Has a deer been spending extra time in your back lawn? Has a cardinal locked eye with you? Has your pet been out-of-the-ordinary affectionate? That’s your loved one working their energy through other life forces to say hello.
  • Numbers: Out of nowhere are you seeing triple digits? Perhaps 111 or 222? Or maybe you’ve started to see another meaningful number (like your loved ones’ birth year) on license plates, receipts and emails? That’s them working their magic.
  • Odd Objects, Perfectly Placed: If you’re out for a nature walk and come across something that catches your eye: a penny, a red handkerchief (your grandpa always had a handkerchief with him!), a feather…Yup, that’s them too! Or maybe the ring you’ve been looking for mysteriously ends up on your nightstand. You can thank your loved one in spirit for that as well!

Once you receive a sign, send thanks. Our loved ones in spirit appreciate our gratitude and will continue sending us more signs. 

Join me in spreading my messages of breaking judgement habits and strengthening intuition even further: forward this blog to a few family members and friendsThe greater the shares, the greater the impact – They can subscribe here.  

Sincerely,
Danielle

 
PS – The exact time I finished writing this article and saved it was 11:11. Wow spirit is good!

PPS – To help combat doubt about the signs you’re receiving, it can be beneficial to keep a journal. Every day, capture anything and everything that sparks you as unique: A license plate. An email. A song. Be sure to also write about what you were doing and thinking about before and after you received the sign. Every few weeks review your journal notes. Now that you have several signs documented, is it easier to see that they aren’t just coincidences? Are you able to make deeper meaning from your signs, helping to strengthen your belief? For example, do you see a cardinal right before a special family day like your deceased mom’s birthday?  

Allow Yourself To Be Human

The other morning, when dropping Charlie off at Puppy Palace (yup! He’s spoiled and yes, they have a salt water pool for my ‘boujee’ pup), I led him into the main waiting room with no leash and collar on. This is usually fine but there was another dog in there I didn’t see. The Puppy Palace rules are, if there’s more than one dog in the waiting room, your dog should be leashed to avoid any unnecessary biting, fighting or other aggressive behaviors. If you’re not a dog owner, please know these types of behaviors are rare. Some dogs just aren’t fans of other dogs or people, especially if they’ve lived a hard life.

Charlie wandered over to the other dog and before I could grab a hold of him, the pups started sniffing each other. While neither dog showed hostility or bad juju toward the other, one of the workers had to separate them just in case.

Even though unintentional, I felt bad that I broke the rule. I sensed the worker was frazzled and perhaps a bit angry with me (I say ‘sensed’ because she had a mask on, so I couldn’t rely on regular facial clues). I wouldn’t blame her for being a bit miffed; after all, I should know the drill. Charlie has been going there for years.

“I’m so sorry about this,” I muttered with regret and sincerity in my voice. The worker didn’t reply, so I kept going, trying to make things right, “That dog is small and I didn’t see him as I came in. Again, I’m so sorry.” The worker walked away, never once acknowledging my apology.

How rude! I thought as I walked up to the front desk to sign Charlie in.

With my emotions high, experiencing a mix of Ugh Danielle. You’re so careless, and I can’t believe she just walked away from me, I unloaded on the young man at the desk.

“I’ve never had something so rude happen to me here. I gave an apology and that worker just walked away from me…”

The man replied with a warm smile on his face, “Oh goodness. Don’t be upset. She probably didn’t hear you. She’s hard of hearing.”

Whoa! I had never considered that.

I let out a sigh, “Wow. That must be it. Thanks for telling me.”

Just then, the worker came out and I couldn’t miss my chance to say sorry to her. This time she heard me. She was light and forgiving.

The second I got home from dropping Charlie off, I wrote a draft of this blog so that the encounter was fresh in my mind and I could perfectly capture the ‘don’t make assumptions’ moral. But while writing, I identified a greater depth to that moral: I’m human. I make mistakes. I feel things deeply. And I’ll never get every interaction right.

A few years ago, I would have thought about this situation for hours, beating myself up for not knowing the worker was partially deaf, for being too emotional or too quick to assume she was rude. But this time, as I sat down to write, I felt pride. My brain wasn’t tangled with questions, but instead I had clarity on why I made my assumption: I’m a loud person. I’d talked to this worker many times before and we’d never had troubles communicating. I was proud of myself for realizing there was no need to be mad with myself, it was an honest mistake – and as a human, I’m allowed to make many of those.

Instead of letting this uncomfortable encounter bubble inside of me for hours or days, I spoke my truth and within seconds I was rewarded with someone else’s truth. By expressing my emotions about the situation to the young man behind the desk, I found a truth that released me from purposeless emotion.

So my true moral of this story is: when we let ourselves be human, we can bring out the best in a situation.

Join me in spreading my messages of breaking judgement habits and strengthening intuition even further: forward this blog to a few family members and friendsThe greater the shares, the greater the impact – They can subscribe here.  

Sincerely,
Danielle

PS – Here’s an affirmation to use when you find yourself getting down on everything that makes you YOU, “I love myself as I am.”

PPS – Is there an awkward encounter you repeat in your head and you ask yourself: Why did I sound so lame? How did I make that blunder? If so, grab your pen and journal. Write the encounter down as a story. What did you do and say? What did the other person do and say? Once you’ve captured it, end the story with a lesson: What did you learn? Perhaps what did the other person learn? Read your now complete story and let all those negative vibes go, as this story is no longer negative: it has a lesson and that’s your positive spin.

Decisions, Decisions

At least several times a week a client asks for my help in making a decision. And fortunately, I’m there to assist.

I’ll tap in energetically to give my read on a certain situation. I’ll offer advice from my lived experiences. I’ll ask certain questions to get them thinking about the choice differently.

But ultimately, the decision is theirs to make. I don’t make decisions for others, and that leaves some feeling lost and confused. Regularly, I’ll receive some push back: Okay, so just tell me what to do… I’m just too frazzled to do this on my own… What do you think I should do? What do you mean you can’t make this decision for me? Tell me the right thing to do…

It makes sense that we want the right answer. We’ve all gone stir crazy racking our brains to find some kind of ultimate, best solution. But most times, the way we define right, well isn’t quite right — Oftentimes, we are looking for a quick fix, the easy answer or for someone to take that decision-making weight off our shoulders.  
       
Here’s what I know to be true: sometimes (most times actually!) there isn’t a right or wrong. All of the potential paths we can take will provide their own beautiful opportunities for soul growth.

I know! Not the answer you were looking for. But keep reading.

Even though there may not be a right way, there may be a path that best serves you. And to understand what that is, it’s my fierce belief that you hold that answer (not me or anyone else).

You hold the wisdom within yourself to serve yourself best. Yes, of course, getting a new perspective from a book, a friend, a coach, or a psychic can absolutely help but their wisdom is to help awaken the wisdom that is already inside of YOU.

So how do you tap into your inner knowing to help you make the decision that best serves you?     

I’m glad you asked…

Detach from the concept of right and wrong and detach from outcomes.

Oftentimes, we get so fixated on our desired end result of a decision, that we lose sight of the journey. It’s so natural and human to want a specific outcome, but our attachment to that desire only blurs our vision of the situation. We feel a false sense of control when we believe that a decision will produce a specific end result. I’m so sorry to tell you this: But you cannot control the future!  
           
The reality is, life will throw us unexpecteds and curveballs and we need to honor that. Sure, we should have goals and aim for them, think things through, and weigh the pros and cons to reduce our anxiety surrounding the situation. We just can’t get caught up in the mind game of outcomes. We don’t have absolute control over what happens!  And sometimes what we think we want (like that new job or new boyfriend) is not what’s best for us (but we don’t know that because we don’t know everything involved with that decision).
  
Instead, when making a decision, quiet your mind, connect with your heart (I suggest you put both hands on your heart), tap into your intuition and ask yourself: What path will serve the highest good for me and all involved?

Your innerYOU will love this question and will give you the wisdom you seek. Because while your mind doesn’t have all the answers, your soul does.

Join me in spreading my messages of breaking judgement habits and strengthening intuition even further: forward this blog to a few family members and friendsThe greater the shares, the greater the impact – They can subscribe here.  

Sincerely,
Danielle

PS – Here’s an affirmation to empower you when making a decision, “I trust that I will guide myself to the right decision.”

PPS – Are you still struggling with what decision to make? If so, grab your pen and journal. Start writing down all the things you love about yourself: I’m funny. I’m an involved Dad. I make the best chicken pot pie. I’m an inspiring and caring manager. Keep this list going for at least 5 minutes. How do you feel? Good right? Loved? Like a badass? Awesome, you should! Now lean into the decision, put your hands on your heart and ask yourself what you should do. The answer that comes is your soul talking.

Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff

Dad treasured his wood furniture. Every week, he’d break out the Pine-Sol and polish his tables, his bedframe and his Lane cedar hope chest. He cherished his wooden possessions so much so, that when we were younger, he placed a strict “No touch!” policy on me and my siblings.

While Dad was never diagnosed, looking back on his behaviors I believe he had some form of OCD. If one of us kids was even an arm’s-length away from a wooden dining chair or God-forbid his hope chest, Dad’s body would tense up and he’d scowl, “Get out of here. You’re too close.” Dad literally feared a scratch or ding. This deep connection to his possessions always struck me as odd. I remember thinking to myself, Why do we have this beautiful dining room set if we’re never allowed to use it?

Regardless of my Dad’s quirks and flaws, I have always been a daddy’s girl. Dad is one of the greatest loves and teachers of my life.

So when Dad died eight years ago, I was crushed. My first instinct was to hang on to everything he owned and cherished, but I knew I didn’t have the space. And so, I got rid of most of his larger pieces (including the dining room set I never had a chance to eat on), but decided to keep his hope chest.

It felt odd taking his hope chest home. For all my childhood I was barely allowed near it, and then it was in my bedroom. I put a doily on it for protection and dusted it a few times a week. I’d get out the Pine-Sol every few weeks. I was always nervous about something happening to it and doing right by Dad.

Fast forward a few years. My family and I decided to move from just outside of Boston to the Tampa Bay area. Somehow in the move, the chest got a nick in it.

Although the size of the ding was smaller than ¼ of a Cheerio (Think: the size of scratch that an ant would leave, if it could), it felt like the size of a baseball. I felt guilty. Disrespectful to Dad. I’d go to sleep staring at the big horrific gaping hole (don’t we love the illusions of guilt?) and would pray to Dad, I am so sorry. I understand if you’re upset. I’m careless. I should have done better.

Fast forward again. This time to a few months later. I was on a call with my spiritual mentor April who’s also a psychic medium. Seemingly out of the blue she said, “Honey. Your Dad is here. You keep hurting yourself every night. What are you doing to yourself, sweet child? It has something to do with a piece of furniture. Did something get wrecked? Your Dad is saying he doesn’t care. All he cares about is you. You need to stop being so hard on yourself.”

Tears poured down my face. I cried and cried some more. In that moment, I released it all. The anxiety Dad gave me as a child. The need to be perfect and follow his rules. The false idea that Dad is up in Heaven upset about a furniture scratch (I mean really, in hindsight how crazy of me to think that Dad has the ability to travel pretty much anywhere he wants and enjoy the freedoms of afterlife, but instead he’s worrying about a small dent on a piece of furniture).

Today, Dad’s cedar chest is in my bedroom proudly displaying its ding. Sure, I could sand it down. Put polish over it. But why? It’s a perfect reminder that mistakes and imperfections are only perceived and that my loved ones in spirit aren’t spending their time sweating the small stuff – and neither should I.

Join me in spreading my messages of breaking judgement habits and strengthening intuition even further: forward this blog to a few family members and friendsThe greater the shares, the greater the impact – They can subscribe here.  

Sincerely,
Danielle

PS – Here’s a self-forgiveness affirmation, “I release the past and the weight it has brought me. All that exists is now.”

PPS – Oftentimes we let a perceived bad experience sour the way we look at a person, place or thing. For example, the waitress accidentally spills the tray of waters on you, and you decide never to return to that one Mexican restaurant. You were wearing your green socks the day you got fired, so you’ve sworn off green socks (not hard to do, but St. Patty’s Day does find us once a year). Grab your pen and journal. Is there an opportunity to create a new story with that person, place or thing? Perhaps you could go order some carnitas with friends and create a new positive memory, or wear green socks while you give an epic presentation? This activity will remind you that you hold the power to write your own story.

The Truth About Being A Psychic Medium


I’m a psychic medium.

I blend with the energies of my sitter (aka my client) and their loved ones in spirit to deliver evidence that their departed loved one still exists. The evidence comes in many forms:

“I know when you see blue jays at your bird feeder, you think of your Grandma…”

“I’m being made aware of a heart necklace your husband gave you; you set it on a butterfly shaped tray every night before bed.”

How is this possible? I don’t even fully know, but the way I understand it is, spirits blend with my nervous system so that I receive information using my senses. During a reading, I’ll typically receive a combination of physical feeling (perhaps my cheek will feel droopy, signaling a stroke), seeing through my mind’s eye (such as a detailed picture of a kitchen), and hearing (like a soft whisper). And sometimes, I just know things (I picture spirit dropping facts and information into my mind, but no worries, it doesn’t hurt).

My specialty is feeling the departed’s personality and love for the sitter. The senses I receive help paint a picture of how spirits want to communicate:

“I sense Mom lit up when baking pies. She would dance a lot while baking. Mom was a gentle soul who made you feel loved by reading you stories and tucking you in at night. She’s making me aware that you would ask ‘how come?’ a lot when you were little and that would always make her laugh. She loved you so much.”

My sitters are often surprised and caught off-guard by my abilities. I don’t blame them; I know that illustrating such personal details can be weird and mystifying, but it comes from a source of love. Delivering messages from spirit gives my sitter hope, understanding and healing.

Becoming a medium is a whole different story, but one thing I’ve learned is you need to be okay with not knowing everything; the ability to accept the unknown is needed or else my logical mind would be so frazzled from my ‘spiritual-spidey senses’ that I’d never sleep. But I digress…

In case you’re wondering, there wasn’t a single defining moment that made me say, “Yup! I’m a medium!”. I didn’t accidentally hit my head and wake up one day to find I can see the future (The Dead Zone, anyone?). My gifts unfolded naturally. When my dad passed away eight years ago, I could feel him close: warm tingles on my neck and right shoulder. When my nana passed, I felt her in a similar way. Back then, I couldn’t explain these feelings and the odd sense of clarity I had, knowing the sensations were my dad and nana. It wasn’t until I lost my job a few years back that my mediumship began to blossom. That time in my life sparked a Dark Night of the Soul, a time of spiritual depression and awakening in which I healed past traumas, stripped some of my ego and dedicated myself to forming a deeper connection with spirit.

Since stepping into my mediumship abilities, I’ve become aware of many misconceptions about ‘people like me’. I’m not sure where they come from, but my best guesses are the portrayals of psychics/mediums in movies like Ghost or the witches from Hocus Pocus (nope, I don’t fly around on a broom and cast spells… but that would be pretty cool!).

What I’ve found from the general public is mediums are either praised for our metaphysical ‘supernatural’ gifts or shunned because we’re crazy, we’re too ‘woo-woo’ or worse, because we’re practicing voodoo, black magic or whatever else people falsely call it and believe it to be.

To help shatter misconceptions of how a medium lives and works, here’s a glimpse into my personal life and practice:

  • I don’t own a crystal ball and have never used one. Yes, I own crystals, but you may be surprised to know I don’t know the names of many of them (besides amethyst, my birthstone and a few others). I just think they are pretty and I like holding them.
  • To prepare to connect with spirit before a sitting, I don’t have a long ritual that includes a frog’s leg and a bubbling kettle of potions. Most times, I take a quick walk or jump around to get my blood going and my vibes up. Sometimes I’ll sing to clear my mind (there’s no haunting chant… it’s more like tunes from The Lion King or Frozen).
  • When I’m talking to you outside of a mediumship session, you don’t have to worry about me having an unknown side conversation with your dead Aunt Sally about the bad breakup or stacks of dirty dishes in your sink that you don’t want me to know about. I only connect with someone’s loved one once I receive consent. This is how any ethical medium works.
  • I am not a ‘quack’ – I don’t pretend to be an expert in mediumship. As someone who has earned her doctorate in business, I’m trained to make decisions with logic, data and facts. I wouldn’t call myself a medium without credibility. I’ve learned from leading mediums in the USA and UK. Sure, frauds exist in any profession, but that’s not me or any of the mediums in my circle.
  • A lot of mediums come with a ‘I’ve had this gift since I was 3 years old’ story or a ‘I almost lost my life’ story that explains the root of their gifts. As you learned earlier, I don’t have that kind of story and the gift hasn’t come 100% natural to me. I take classes. I read books. I study. I practice. I practice some more.
  • Other than being able to predict that my teenage son will sleep until noon on Saturday or that he’ll complain about having to do the dishes, I can’t predict the future. What I can do is get a sense of how a decision feels. All of us live by free will and things are always changing, so it’s impossible to know what’s going to happen. And what’s the fun in that anyways?
  • Contrary to what many people believe, it’s not all vegan organic for us mediums. I eat bacon. Yup! I eat meat and I believe it’s fine to honor what my body craves. And I believe the animals are good with it too. However, I will say my desire for a hamburger or a Chick-Fil-A sandwich has subdued since getting into this line of work. I also eat French fries. I drink beer. And yes, I also enjoy hippie-dippy teas and concoctions made of dandelion root and chaga mushroom.
  • I’m not a saint. I’ve cheated. I’ve lied. I’ve hurt others. I’ve hurt myself. Daily I make mistakes. I yell. I let my ego get the best of me. I’m human and living proof that you don’t need to be perfect to connect with spirit.
  • When I’m not working as a medium, I don’t see spirits or talk to them on the regular (other than when I meditate or pray).
  • Just like you may be, I am also regularly perplexed and sometimes I even doubt mediumship. I mean really, it’s crazy to think that I communicate with the dead.


Join me in spreading my messages of breaking judgement habits and strengthening intuition even further: forward this blog to a few family members and friendsThe greater the shares, the greater the impact – They can subscribe here.  

Sincerely,
Danielle

PS – Are you interested in a mediumship session with me? If so, I’d be honored to work with you. 
 

I’ve Been Talking To My Pinky Toe

We’re starting this blog with a flashback. Picture this: It’s around noon on a weekend, I’m maybe seven years old, and it’s time for lunch. I march down to the cellar – barefooted – to snag a glass bottle of apple juice for lunchtime. Apple juice secured. As I turn back toward the stairs, I slip and the glass bottle falls, shattering everywhere. One of the glass chards cuts through my pinky toe so bad that I lose feeling in it permanently.

Fast forward: I’m adjusting to crutches jammed into my armpits for months, and I’m basically learning how to walk againNo fun!

And now: Ever since that incident, I haven’t been able to move my pinky toe. And while the pinky toe may be the smallest, it’s actually one of the most crucial toes in helping us maintain our balance.

Over the years, I’ve experienced more and more problems with my equilibrium. My hip issues and the way I teeter while I walk are thanks to my lunchtime adventure for the golden juice gone wrong.

About eight months ago, realizing I didn’t want my issues to get any worse, I started talking to my pinky toe, hoping to get it to move.

“Come on. You can do it. Just move a little, for me.”

“I believe in you. I believe in self-healing. We can do this.”

Most times I’d talk to my toe in my mind, but every now and then as I put on my socks or as I’d get ready for bed, I’d speak to my toe out loud.

I didn’t see progress, but I didn’t give up. I kept at it as I know the power of self-healing. I’ve cured myself of regular headaches. PTSD. Arthritis. And more. I was able to heal myself with a combination of believing I had the power to do so, making needed lifestyle changes and consistently showing up for myself: mind, body and soul.

Recently (drum roll, please!), I made a huge milestone on my pinky toe healing journey. I can now move it about 50-60% of the time when I ask it to move. Amazing right? After thirty years, my body has healed a bit. And while I still have more growth ahead, I’m happy with my progress and have noticed myself walking with more heel-to-toe symmetry on both my right and left side. Among other things this has alleviated some of my back pain. Thank you, God.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with self-healing, this whole ‘I found healing by asking my pinky toe to show signs of life’ thing may seem bonkers. I get it. If this wasn’t my reality, I’d think it was bonkers too. But I promise you, self-healing is real and you don’t need to be an expert to cure yourself.

The #1 thing you can do if you’d like to heal an ailment is to shift your perspective and believe you can heal. Once you tell yourself you can and believe you can, anything is possible.

There’s tons of research out there on self-healing. I’ll let you find what resonates with you if you’re interested, but I will recommend Amy B. Scher’s book, How to Heal Yourself When No One Else Can: A Total Self-Healing Approach for Mind, Body & Soul if want to learn more about the healing possibilities you hold.

Join me in spreading my messages of breaking judgement habits and strengthening intuition even further: forward this blog to a few family members and friendsThe greater the shares, the greater the impact – They can subscribe here.  

Sincerely,
Danielle

PS – Here’s an affirmation to use to remind yourself that you have the power to heal, ‘With the peace, belief and purpose I hold, anything is possible.’

PPS – Sometimes we protect ourselves from believing in something because we’re afraid to get hurt if the thing we believe in doesn’t come true. If you’re holding onto fear, grab your pen and journal so that you can work to release it. What are you scared to believe in? What’s your perceived risk in believing in this thing? What’s the worst that could happen if you believed but it didn’t come true? Now what’s the best thing that could happen if you put your fears to the side and started to believe?

A higher version of YOU

A higher version of YOU

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